I have a simple, effective solution to the all-too-common chaos and confusion and disruption of the peace and quiet and safety of Indiana by masses of mostly IUP students. With plenty of sympathy to Indiana residents who have been affected, I offer the following open letter to President Michael A. Driscoll, of IUP:
Sir, I realize that you are new to our area, having come from distant, peaceful, serene Alaska. But you should know that long before there was an IUP, there was a quiet little community of Indiana. And for more than a century after there was an IUP, there was a quiet little community of Indiana.
All of that has now changed, and as chief executive officer for the university you are in a position to regain control, to “raise the bar” at IUP. With a simple pen stroke, you can authorize as policy and procedure my proposal which follows. I have even prepared the wording for you:
WHEREAS, IUP is an institution of higher learning, and WHEREAS, IUP expects only the highest of moral standards and principles from its students, and WHEREAS, IUP recognizes that it is a partner of equal with the local community and desires always to be held in the highest of regard in said community, and WHEREAS, IUP supports and abides by all efforts of law enforcement and responsible civil and social behavior, and WHEREAS, IUP is ultimately responsible for the safety and well-being of its students and associated others, LET IT BE IMMEDIATELY RESOLVED AND MANDATED that any student cited for underage drinking (i.e., breaking the law) while enrolled as a student at IUP shall receive an immediate expulsion and a forfeiture of all fees, tuition, scholarships and credits for the semester in which the citation occurred.
Surely this will be a good start.
I do wish to acknowledge that there are many fine students and faculty at IUP with much to be proud of, but regrettably their accomplishments are indirectly tarnished by the immature and illegal behavior of others.
And I would like to tip my hat to borough council President Nancy Jones for her courageous call to action! But these are your students, President Driscoll, and to deny or turn away from this issue at this time, or to simply release the standard pat response from IUP’s public relations office, would be a sad moment of administrative neglect.