DEAR ABBY: I live in a fairly well-to-do neighborhood on a cul-de-sac.
There has been an increase in the traffic on my street, and I suspect it’s because a neighbor’s adult son has been selling drugs. Most of the cars are driven by young people who park for five to 10 minutes at the most, and all of them walk around to the back of the house. Hypodermic needles have been found in the street.
Should I talk to the police and risk alienating my neighbors, or should I keep quiet because I have no definite proof?
I don’t think the parents would believe me if I told them; they seem to think their child can do no wrong. Also, if I do file a police report and they find out, I’m afraid they will retaliate. Help! — NOT SURE WHAT TO DO
DEAR NOT SURE: Don’t keep quiet. It’s important that the police be notified before the problem becomes worse. Call your local anonymous tip line and report where you have seen the suspicious activity and the needles. No personal information from you will be asked, and your privacy will be protected.
DEAR ABBY: I had some time to think over the summer, and came to the realization that a baby my girlfriend had almost 30 years ago may be my daughter. “Sally” and I had a very intense, but short-lived relationship that blew up. About a year later we met again for lunch at the behest of a mutual friend.
I don’t remember the details, but I do remember searching for an accurate way to compliment her. Because she had put on weight, the best I could come up with was “you look good.” She didn’t hit me, but the conversation went downhill from there.
Sally mentioned as we were parting that she had given birth to a daughter. I haven’t heard from her since.
I don’t want to create problems for anybody, but I’m curious. I’m happily married and plan to stay that way. At the same time, I’d welcome having a daughter.
I have thought about sending cheek swabs and a check-off DNA test to the child along with a note suggesting she send our samples in for testing. But that could destroy whatever story she may have grown up with.
I’m at a loss here. I could use some advice from an outside authority. What do you think I should do? — BLOCKHEAD IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR B.H.: It’s been 30 years. The “child” is a woman now. Before you risk starting WW III, why not contact the mother and ask if you are her daughter’s father, because it’s possible that you aren’t.
DEAR ABBY: I’m 20 years old and have never dated anyone. I have a lot of friends and do well in school and at work, and I try to be a good, kind, friendly person.
What can I do to make myself datable? Am I missing some crucial step in how to become a girlfriend? — OLD MAID IN ST. LOUIS
DEAR OLD MAID: Because I have never met you in person, I can’t tell you what you might be doing that relegates you to the “only as a friend” category. However, some of your guy friends might be able to tell you. And you should also solicit some tips from your girlfriends.